On My First Day

Finally the day has come where I will have to get my lazy ass off to work. Since received a call from them I have been having a mixed feeling about this. I hope I could share it with you about the excitement and anxiety; moreover other feelings that I couldn't explain but I knew it was not a suitable to share because you were still asleep and had to go out. You'd always be the person I want to share nevertheless. Despite these facts, I am going to try to compose it here, this makes you the first to know.

I am feeling excited because I finally think of bringing you here with me soon, theres nothing more can be exciting besides that. You the second to none sayang. I am feeling anxious about the fact that I am going to be spending my daytime time at the office, without bringing you on Skype with me. I was so used to that, I've been blessed with all the love you have given to me. Honestly, I will miss you dearly. I want to talk to you before you go to bed as usual. I believe in us, I believe that one day we'll be together and overcome this together. However, I am still going to text or call you whenever I have the chance, you know I'd always do that my love. I know you trust me on this. I just hope that I'll be able to be home before you're awake sayang, so that you won't have to wait for me cause I certainly know how it exactly feels.

Whenever I am out of words, I will always express it here. It will just take a while till I meet you again. The day will come soon I pray that everyday cause you're my only happiness and you're the only one that matters to me. Just bear that in mind.

Whenever you're feeling down at work, just read the letter I wrote to you about my rough predictions on what will happen. You just need to put your trust on me. Don't worry sayang, it will take death even before I neglect you. At the end of the day, I am doing this for you my only love. Love you my sweetheart.

Lost Without You

Sayang, I'm lying here on my bed while you are sleeping on the other side of the world. It's been months since the last time we met. Till this very moment I don't know what am I doing here without you. I am so lost without you. It is so painful inside me, it is too painful that I barely even bear. Sayang, all I want is to have you here by my side, or at least to be there with you wherever you go. Beside you is where I belong. Suddenly, I am feeling so down and emotional now. I'm missingl you badly. More than words can say. I wish you could wipe my tears away now...

Greatest Moments

There are too many great moments to mention when it comes to us. Meeting you in the first place was one of the greatest moments in my life. Right now, I suddenly reminisce about the time when you flew all the way to KL just to be with me. Thank you sayang, no one can ever do anything like that for me. It was a big sacrifice you made when you came here. Despite the time constraint you had with assignments and upcoming exams, you still came to me. I really appreciate that sayang. You have no idea how much I am missing you right now. I feel like Skyping with you is just not enough although we do that all the time. I may sound that I have nothing else to do but just cling to you. Honestly, I am afraid that you might be bored looking at me on the screen everyday. You might be thinking that I have no where else to go but on my bed but the truth is I would rather be with you. This may sound crazy but there is no other things I want in life more than I want to be with you. 

It has been almost a month and a half since you left but I am already missing you like mad. The truth is I can't get you off my head, I think about you when I drive, I think about you when I eat, I think about you when I shower, I think about you when I sleep, I think about you all the time. I never thought I could feel this way in the first place. You got me going crazy all over you sayang. I am with you now not just because I want to be your boyfriend, but I want to be your future husband. Be a responsible father for our kids. I told you before, I have never been this serious before and I can hardly wait for that moment to come. 

Life with you is going to be so beautiful. The best thing is that I am going to be able to see your face every single day of my life. I promise you that I am going to be good to you my love. I will give all my love to you. I am so devoted to you. My love for you is borderless. I can't stop loving you. Just have faith in me sayang, keep on believing in us. I know that sometimes we may argue about small things, I believe that is because we are far apart. We miss each other and we couldn't communicate enough that was the cause of the small arguments. We were never involved in arguments when we were together that much. I know that long distance relationship can be quite difficult at time. I have read few articles about this and apparently they are facing the same situation as well. So we are not alone sayang, a lot of other people are going through what are now. 

The good thing is that we came from the same motherland and I strongly believe that we'll meet again not long enough, at least I will work it out this time. You have sacrificed a lot by coming here before, now it is going to be my turn okay? You're everything to me, remember that.

My Love

When I said that I love you, I meant every word I said. It is more than anything that you could ever imagined. I know that you'd not be able to understand this, but I am so into you. Love is a big word, but when it comes to loving you, it's bigger than any words that can explain. I wish that I could put it in words, in different languages so that can express myself in every different way. It would have been better if I could express myself by using Semitic languages which are flawless and accurate. 

When I am out of words this is what I like doing, monologging. Sometimes I am just afraid express myself too much by telling you cause I might just make you feel uncomfortable and bored. It is quite painful at time when I fail to let you know how exactly I feel about you, how much I love you and miss you. So the least I can do is writing through blogs, believing that this will be a better option than Facebook notes cause  you'd still be able to read this forever even after I die. I just don't want you to ever forget this, I have been consistent about the way I feel for you. I really meant every word I told you before and till this very moment. I might be repeating the things I said back to back but this is really coming from my heart right now.

I am aware that most guys have egos, I do but not when it comes to you. I will feel so inferior without you, I will feel inferior without your love. You're the only one who makes me more confident about myself. Without you, I am good for nothing. That's why I have told you many times that you deserve everything good in this life. I always try my best to do that, I know that I am not perfect, but I wanna be perfect for you. I will always try my best to deserve your love. You're everything to me. I devote my life, my heart and my soul for you. I really hope that you can see that from me. It's really important to me. I am sorry if this bothers your feelings sayang, if it does, don't have to read my future posts.

I realised that I couldn't live a minute without you. It's proven that even when we're apart like now, I need you to be with me all the time. We've been Skyping all the time since you left, thanks very much for your time sayang. I really appreciate it. I can't imagine what's my life going to be without you in front of me when I start working. I am always afraid the future sayang, I feel so small, I feel so inferior whenever I think about the future. I don't know what the future's going to be like. As far as I know, the only thing I want in this world is to be with you for the rest of life. I feel that my life is short, since I met you, I know that 'this is it'. You're the one for me, you're the only one I wanna be with, no one else but you.

I dream about being with you all the time, having a family with you would be so wonderful, seeing you every time I wake up is going to make my day and growing old with you will be the most beautiful journey of my life. I am deeply in love you, probably more than you would ever love me. Trust me. My Love.